Sunday, March 21, 2021

World Traveling...

 Me: Do you have anyone else that can grab you on Wednesday from the train station?

Him: No.

Me: So it's just me?

Him: Well, what else do you have to do?

Me: Um, well, I do work for a living...


The Mom in me knows he didn't mean it to come out like that, but it did.  And in fact, I was fine to get him if he came out of the city after 3pm, which is what we had discussed, but of course, we've been discussing a lot lately, and he had forgotten.

Weeks ago he had asked me to help him find a hotel in the city so he could explore the city on his own for his birthday.  We discussed what he wanted to do, where he wanted to stay, amenities, and time frames.  And then didn't discuss it again until 5 days before he wanted to go.  Five days people.  Even I can not work vacation magic with 5 days notice. 

The time frame was supposed to correspond with when I'd be bringing his brother back to school.  It did not.  It was also supposed to account for weather.  It did not.  Nonetheless, we found a hotel room, with a pool, close to his brother, and some friends that are also in the city for school. We booked a nonrefundable room because the date was so close. Two days later he debated canceling the whole thing because he was yet again fighting with the girlfriend.  The next morning it was on, then off, then on again. Tuesday came and I drove them to the train station, until we realized it was closed for renovations. The next two were closed as well.  Once back on the highway I just drove to the city, found a quiet side street relatively close to where they wanted to be, and left them both on the curb.

I didn't hear another peep out of them until they came out early on Wednesday. Luckily, I had also gotten out early from work. I was able to pick them up easily without much traffic from the train station. They saw some friends, had lunch around town, and stayed on the 26th floor.  The pool and hot tub was fantastic and they had hella fun as I'm told. As soon as we landed at the house, he drove her home and he was off hanging with friends.  A perk to being literally in between jobs at the moment. He returned home around 9pm, with the sole purpose of booking a bus ticket to New York. 

About a month ago he had told me he was meeting up with a friend who booked an Airbnb on Long Island for his leave from the military. This friend is less than reliable and he has burned them before. So when there was no mention of it again, I figured it had gone up in smoke like most of this guy's plans. Apparently, it did not.  However, time had brought some sense into Youngest, who hates to drive even 30 minutes, and he decided to come to me for other means of travel. I am torn by this, as the Hubs thinks he comes to me because he's too lazy to do it on his own.  I think he does it because he's insecure in his own ability and doesn't want to screw it up. Regardless, I helped him look at options.  Eventually, he settled on the bus, a much safer and cheaper option that will result in far fewer headaches than driving 5 hours through 3 states.  

After booking the trip, hand on the doorknob, he was headed out again.  There was a brief loud discussion, about how he needed to slow down because without down time the weekend would be a disaster.  We had words, he was tired, I was frustrated, and I walked away.  Clearly, hand on the door knob, he wasn't going to listen anyway. Around 11:15 I texted him, and got no answer.  On my way around the house locking up I noticed his car outside, and went down to his room.  He'd never left. Hand on the door, he'd closed it back up when I walked away and went downstairs to bed. Could it be I am actually penetrating his teenage psyche? Nah. But I'll take it as a win. 

Friday he coordinated his own ride into the city for the bus.  The Mom of the friend he's going with didn't have to work until 11, so she shot them into the bus station with ease.  I got a conformation that he was on the bus, and a few frantic texts about how he'd be getting to the Airbnb from Penn Station. he summoned and Uber, and an hour later he was beach side on Long Island. Not that I wanted this to blow up in his face, but I was genuinely surprised when the Airbnb was in fact real and actually booked for the week. And aside from that conformation, I have received radio silence for the weekend, until 730 pm this evening when he confirmed that the bus had left on time and that he was on it.

This week has proven challenging for both of us. For him, being the grown up of both groups, having to coordinate and map out where they were going is different for him. He had to problem solve and spend his own money. He had to work around other people's schedules and have it not be all about him.

For me, I had to let him do this. It was honestly easier than I thought it would be. When I heard a siren I didn't worry that it was for him. I did not need to know if he was coming home or not each night. And while I'm sure he was doing things I wouldn't like, I wasn't immediately confronted with it. 

What was hard was just being the Husband and myself for 4 nights. We tend spend money in down time folks, and find projects we didn't even know we had, stopping myself just short of buying a new refrigerator. We picked up an old trunk for my friend to refinish.  We bought paint for the bathroom ceiling. I impulse bought the lights I've been debating for months, hung them up, and put them on a timer.


Him: Did you see your lights came on?

Me: No. Do they look festive?

Him: Like we're ready for a wild party.

Me:  It's 7:17. I'm in my bathrobe, eating cool whip and pudding straight from the container.

Him: Yip. Paaarrr-tayyyy.

I guess, if we string them up the party will come to us?

I hope they bring their own Cool Whip.  And Bathrobes.


3 comments:

  1. You'd be surprised...your words sink in. Maybe they all don't end with him using the best judgment, as they did here, but they are sinking in. And yes, your lights look very festive!

    ReplyDelete
  2. It is amazing how much and what sinks in andwe often don't f ind out till they are in their 30'sor 40's

    ReplyDelete
  3. I don't know how you maintain any kind of calm, but you're doing well. In fact, you're great, amazing, and any other synonym. I admire you. I love the lights, too.

    Love,
    Janie

    ReplyDelete

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